Men or women, rich or poor, old or young, happy or unhappy, yesterday or today..... all of us want the same thing: to be loved, to love, to find a right person, to be happy, to be together, not to be alone, not to feel lonely, to grow old with this person together, to be friends, partners, lovers, family and etc. Yeah, that is simple.
All I want is to be happy, yes, just happy. Why is it so hard sometimes just simply to be happy and to make someone happy, because no matter how crazy or weird, or strange, or different, of fucked up I am, I can make someone happy, I am a right person for someone, I am "the one" for someone and that someone out there is looking for me, just for me, because I am desperately looking or desperately waiting for him to find me.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
CHOICES WE MAKE VS. DREAMS WE HAVE
Wasn't it it easy growing up with our parents decisions....
What we were wearing, eating, where we were going, with whom we were making friends...........
life almost free of choices, because our parents knew what was the best for us.
They still do know what is the best for us, but..................
we are old enough... ha ha ha..... to make our own choices and/or to ruin our own life if we want to..........
no one to blame for our choices...........
may be that's why sometimes we need an advice, so someone will be eventually responsible for our failures...... or disappointments....... or pain..........
Since this blog is about relationships, I would like to talk about our soulmate-lover-husband-boyfriend choices.
1st decision:
Is he a right guy?
Should I date him?
Should I give him a chance?
Should I waste my time?
Is he a boy-friend material?
Does he have a potential to become my future husband?
I heard if "he is the one, this question won't pop up",
really?!
People say: "if he is the one, you just automatically know it".
Well, that's a relieve.
We can scratch off the list a necessity making this choice.
We won't have to take a sheet of paper and divide the list in two colons with "pluses" and "minuses" signs.
How many of us have ever done it?
My friends did. I have done it.
How much pressure on us to make this vital decision to commit.
"Commitment" - why is it so many letters.........
probably it is a very important word,
I feel like it is a heavy word,
stressful word.
Just lets think about it....
it means he is the one person for the rest of your life or for a pretty long period of time, even if you are going to break up in a month (but you are not planning on it, it is just life and everything might happen),
it is still a decision, it is a choice.
2nd decision:
What if after you are done with your "pluses" and "minuses" list, you are still confused and lost, and frustrated, and need help, and you have so many unanswered questions...
But there is no one to help, really, no one, because it is your life.
What if HE is everything (or almost everything you have ever dreamed of - sounds unreal already),
he is handsome, smart, funny, caring, understanding, loyal, loving, tender, no games, real, sweet, sexy, experienced, knows how to please you, knows how to love you, knows how to touch you, knows how to make you smile, knows how to make you happy,
BUT........
yeah, it is always a "but" or "the" but,
he is a simple, humble, regular guy, no fancy cars, no house on the beach, no fat accounts, no financial security,
BUT
he is crazy about you............
Guys, do not blame us for wanting and looking for, how would you say - "a rich guy" or "a rich husband", it is not about that.....
We are looking for security,
we are looking for headache free life,
money give freedom,
protection,
life free of financial bullshit,
with money we will look better for you,
with money we will cook better meals for you,
with money we can enjoy each other more not dealing with bills disaster,
we can spend more time with our kids,
to have more time to take care of you,
to make your life easier.
It is not about marrying reach, it is an idea of security, idea of beautiful headache free relationships, idea of avoiding routine, idea of not struggling and surviving, idea of a better future for kids.
A man with money is a secure man, established man, confident man, smart man, usually intelligent man (or I want to think so), man with passion, hobbies, ideas, style (hopefully).
And we were raised believing that we need a nice dress and nice shoes, and a fancy ride, and a driver, and we have to look great to go to the ball, and meet a prince.
Imagine if we wouldn't have nice shoes, how prince would be embarrassed to go around his kingdom looking for us with an ugly cheap not designer's shoe.
And we were raised to believe that a prince will always fall in love with a poor girl and it will be "happily ever after", or he will look for a frog to kiss and she will turn out to be a beauty, ohhhhhhhhhh, our favorite fairy tales, what have it done to us?!
So, money VS. no money?
Rich-super busy-no time for you at all-but-secure life-with-a-guy-who will never be yours VS. simple-humble life-with-a-totally-almost-perfect-guy-who-will-love-you-forever?!
Decisions....... decisions........... dreams......... dreams..........................
What we were wearing, eating, where we were going, with whom we were making friends...........
life almost free of choices, because our parents knew what was the best for us.
They still do know what is the best for us, but..................
we are old enough... ha ha ha..... to make our own choices and/or to ruin our own life if we want to..........
no one to blame for our choices...........
may be that's why sometimes we need an advice, so someone will be eventually responsible for our failures...... or disappointments....... or pain..........
Since this blog is about relationships, I would like to talk about our soulmate-lover-husband-boyfriend choices.
1st decision:
Is he a right guy?
Should I date him?
Should I give him a chance?
Should I waste my time?
Is he a boy-friend material?
Does he have a potential to become my future husband?
I heard if "he is the one, this question won't pop up",
really?!
People say: "if he is the one, you just automatically know it".
Well, that's a relieve.
We can scratch off the list a necessity making this choice.
We won't have to take a sheet of paper and divide the list in two colons with "pluses" and "minuses" signs.
How many of us have ever done it?
My friends did. I have done it.
How much pressure on us to make this vital decision to commit.
"Commitment" - why is it so many letters.........
probably it is a very important word,
I feel like it is a heavy word,
stressful word.
Just lets think about it....
it means he is the one person for the rest of your life or for a pretty long period of time, even if you are going to break up in a month (but you are not planning on it, it is just life and everything might happen),
it is still a decision, it is a choice.
2nd decision:
What if after you are done with your "pluses" and "minuses" list, you are still confused and lost, and frustrated, and need help, and you have so many unanswered questions...
But there is no one to help, really, no one, because it is your life.
What if HE is everything (or almost everything you have ever dreamed of - sounds unreal already),
he is handsome, smart, funny, caring, understanding, loyal, loving, tender, no games, real, sweet, sexy, experienced, knows how to please you, knows how to love you, knows how to touch you, knows how to make you smile, knows how to make you happy,
BUT........
yeah, it is always a "but" or "the" but,
he is a simple, humble, regular guy, no fancy cars, no house on the beach, no fat accounts, no financial security,
BUT
he is crazy about you............
Guys, do not blame us for wanting and looking for, how would you say - "a rich guy" or "a rich husband", it is not about that.....
We are looking for security,
we are looking for headache free life,
money give freedom,
protection,
life free of financial bullshit,
with money we will look better for you,
with money we will cook better meals for you,
with money we can enjoy each other more not dealing with bills disaster,
we can spend more time with our kids,
to have more time to take care of you,
to make your life easier.
It is not about marrying reach, it is an idea of security, idea of beautiful headache free relationships, idea of avoiding routine, idea of not struggling and surviving, idea of a better future for kids.
A man with money is a secure man, established man, confident man, smart man, usually intelligent man (or I want to think so), man with passion, hobbies, ideas, style (hopefully).
And we were raised believing that we need a nice dress and nice shoes, and a fancy ride, and a driver, and we have to look great to go to the ball, and meet a prince.
Imagine if we wouldn't have nice shoes, how prince would be embarrassed to go around his kingdom looking for us with an ugly cheap not designer's shoe.
And we were raised to believe that a prince will always fall in love with a poor girl and it will be "happily ever after", or he will look for a frog to kiss and she will turn out to be a beauty, ohhhhhhhhhh, our favorite fairy tales, what have it done to us?!
So, money VS. no money?
Rich-super busy-no time for you at all-but-secure life-with-a-guy-who will never be yours VS. simple-humble life-with-a-totally-almost-perfect-guy-who-will-love-you-forever?!
Decisions....... decisions........... dreams......... dreams..........................
Friday, August 20, 2010
QUASIMODO VS. KENT. GOOD GUY VS. BAD GUY. DO NOT IGNORE THE "RED FLAGS"!
HANDSOME VS. UGLY.
SMART VS. IDIOT.
BORING VS. INTERESTING.
GOOD GUY VS. BAD GUY.
A couple days ago I saw a guy walking in my direction, he was handsome, sexy, tall, with olive skin, stylish hair, silky skin and perfect body..... He started a conversation trying to find out what I like to do in my free time. I think I mentioned art shows, galleries, exhibits, opera, theatre, sport and etc. You know what my "Perfect-only-first-five-minutes-prince" said?! He said: "Come on, Barbie, lets go party!" He wasn't perfect anymore..... He just ruined it...... Trust me, sense of humor wasn't his quality. Basically starting right from that moment I knew I should just wish him luck. I knew who he is and what he wants, I could picture our short-maximum-two-dates-future together. It WAS A HUGE (BIGGEST RED FLAG EVER) RED FLAG.....
But some of us, and I know a lot of girls who would give him a chance. A chance to ignore them, a chance not to follow through, a chance to play with them and to play them, a chance to cry over him, a chance to waste their time.
Why?! If we know everything from the beginning. We see all red flags, but we do not want to notice, we are closing our eyes and look in a different direction.
We know he is not the one, but some of us want to waste time to find it out. Ohhhh!
WHY!?
We all have priorities. And it might be a job, family, friends and etc.
But when you are not his second, or third, or even fourth choice, why do you keep asking the same question: "why, why, why, why?" if you knew everything from the beginning.
One of my girlfriends met "that-special-handsome-intelligent-established-perfect (ha ha ha) man!
He was late on a first date (of course, not a big deal, it's traffic in LA),
he didn't reply on her text message for 2 days
and didn't call her back when she asked him to (yeah, people are busy),
he also decided to cancel or postponed a date, because he decided to play golf with his buddies and they went for dinner after and he had to cancel a dinner date (yeah, people have passion for something and they have to spend time with friends),
also he didn't come right away after work when you told him that you are sick, because he had to go to the gym (I understand, health is the most important thing and people must work out),
he never asks how are you or what are you doing (probably, he gives you some space and he is not noisy and annoying),
he prefers to stay at home and order from the Chinese place downstairs and watch TV all evening holding a remote with one hand and hugging you with another.
He doesn't know if you have siblings, where is your family leaves and he always forgets how you like your coffee. He doesn't remember your work schedule and always gets you flowers that give you allergies. He forgets that you hate peanuts and always orders you salad with peanuts and chicken with peanuts. I know I exaggerate but you got my point.
Why are you still trying to fix the relationship? It is no relationships, never was. Why do we like to suffer with a wrong guy just to be with someone?! Why we give a chance to the wrong people?! Why?! WHY!? WHY!??????
And you are still asking why relationship is not working out and you are holding to this man thinking that everything one day will change..... Really?! Are you serious?!
And a nice kind friend is always there for us. A nice guy who is always unnoticed, a nice guy whom we put in our "only friend" list, because he is not handsome (or hot), he is not established (or rich), he doesn't have a glamorous job (he makes his living), but he has a big heart, he knows everything about us, he knows how to make us smile, how to make us happy and we appreciate it, we spend time with him, but he will be always a friend, just a friend, only a friend, because he is a nice guy and apparently right now a comment like "you are a nice guy" is not a compliment at all, it is a destination to "only friend" list.
Why?
What are we looking for?
What do we want?
To cry over some asshole or to give a nice guy a chance to make us actually extremely happy.
Lets look around, lets notice those amazing nice guys...
SMART VS. IDIOT.
BORING VS. INTERESTING.
GOOD GUY VS. BAD GUY.
A couple days ago I saw a guy walking in my direction, he was handsome, sexy, tall, with olive skin, stylish hair, silky skin and perfect body..... He started a conversation trying to find out what I like to do in my free time. I think I mentioned art shows, galleries, exhibits, opera, theatre, sport and etc. You know what my "Perfect-only-first-five-minutes-prince" said?! He said: "Come on, Barbie, lets go party!" He wasn't perfect anymore..... He just ruined it...... Trust me, sense of humor wasn't his quality. Basically starting right from that moment I knew I should just wish him luck. I knew who he is and what he wants, I could picture our short-maximum-two-dates-future together. It WAS A HUGE (BIGGEST RED FLAG EVER) RED FLAG.....
But some of us, and I know a lot of girls who would give him a chance. A chance to ignore them, a chance not to follow through, a chance to play with them and to play them, a chance to cry over him, a chance to waste their time.
Why?! If we know everything from the beginning. We see all red flags, but we do not want to notice, we are closing our eyes and look in a different direction.
We know he is not the one, but some of us want to waste time to find it out. Ohhhh!
WHY!?
We all have priorities. And it might be a job, family, friends and etc.
But when you are not his second, or third, or even fourth choice, why do you keep asking the same question: "why, why, why, why?" if you knew everything from the beginning.
One of my girlfriends met "that-special-handsome-intelligent-established-perfect (ha ha ha) man!
He was late on a first date (of course, not a big deal, it's traffic in LA),
he didn't reply on her text message for 2 days
and didn't call her back when she asked him to (yeah, people are busy),
he also decided to cancel or postponed a date, because he decided to play golf with his buddies and they went for dinner after and he had to cancel a dinner date (yeah, people have passion for something and they have to spend time with friends),
also he didn't come right away after work when you told him that you are sick, because he had to go to the gym (I understand, health is the most important thing and people must work out),
he never asks how are you or what are you doing (probably, he gives you some space and he is not noisy and annoying),
he prefers to stay at home and order from the Chinese place downstairs and watch TV all evening holding a remote with one hand and hugging you with another.
He doesn't know if you have siblings, where is your family leaves and he always forgets how you like your coffee. He doesn't remember your work schedule and always gets you flowers that give you allergies. He forgets that you hate peanuts and always orders you salad with peanuts and chicken with peanuts. I know I exaggerate but you got my point.
Why are you still trying to fix the relationship? It is no relationships, never was. Why do we like to suffer with a wrong guy just to be with someone?! Why we give a chance to the wrong people?! Why?! WHY!? WHY!??????
And you are still asking why relationship is not working out and you are holding to this man thinking that everything one day will change..... Really?! Are you serious?!
And a nice kind friend is always there for us. A nice guy who is always unnoticed, a nice guy whom we put in our "only friend" list, because he is not handsome (or hot), he is not established (or rich), he doesn't have a glamorous job (he makes his living), but he has a big heart, he knows everything about us, he knows how to make us smile, how to make us happy and we appreciate it, we spend time with him, but he will be always a friend, just a friend, only a friend, because he is a nice guy and apparently right now a comment like "you are a nice guy" is not a compliment at all, it is a destination to "only friend" list.
Why?
What are we looking for?
What do we want?
To cry over some asshole or to give a nice guy a chance to make us actually extremely happy.
Lets look around, lets notice those amazing nice guys...
ARE WE READY TO BE HAPPY!??? CAN WE HANDLE HAPPINESS?!
We all want to be happy.
To wake up with a big smile.
To enjoy live.
And everyone has an own definition of happiness.
But each definition will have at least one similarity - we all need someone.
"Someone".......
a friend...
a companion....
a boyfriend.......
girlfriend......
wife...
husband.......
"someone" who is there for us,
someone we can rely on,
someone we can trust,
someone we enjoy to be with,
someone to talk to,
someone who is interesting,
someone who cares,
someone who loves us,
someone to love,
someone to hang out with,
someone to make love to,
someone to wake up with,
someone to fall asleep with,
someone to travel with,
someone to enjoy live with,
someone to take care of us when we are sick,
someone to give us a glass of water when we are dyeing.....lol.......
SOMEONE!!!!!
And we are looking for that special, unique, compatible SOMEONE.
We hope, we believe, we wait, we look, we dream......
And we create that special someone in our mind.
And that someone is so perfect and special that at some point it is hard to believe that this special someone actually exists.......
and we go through search, failures, selection, wrong choices, pain.....
and we do not give up...... we hope......
and one day that special someone finds us........
I am not imagining, I am not dreaming, it happened to one of my friends.
She found him. Or he found her. Or actually they found each other.
They are perfect in each others eyes.
He is her Mr. Right.
He is dreamy.
He is caring, loving, understanding, open, honest, easy, intellectual, interesting, no games, everything so real, so simple, so easy, so right.
It feels right, it feels perfect.
They are happy.
It is so perfect that it is hard to believe. All her friends are skeptical, like: yeah, how long they have been together, or do they live together, or do they even know each other,
or please, honey, be careful, it is so perfect that it is scary.
That's it.
We all want it, but we do not believe in it. We are skeptical. We are used to to be miserable.
Or we are just comfortable not been happy, because happiness is scary, it brings out our fears.
We are not used to good emotions, we are not used to feeling right.
We are used to drama, we are used to difficulties and games.
Perfectionism is scary.
Happiness is scary.
And we sabotage, we ruin, we kill it.
WE destroy it, and we start our search over.
Is it difficult to be happy?
Or it is difficult to make someone happy?
Or it is difficult to believe that someone loves us just the way we are?????
Is it hard stop playing games? or is it scary to commit and settle down?
Or .......what is it?!
To wake up with a big smile.
To enjoy live.
And everyone has an own definition of happiness.
But each definition will have at least one similarity - we all need someone.
"Someone".......
a friend...
a companion....
a boyfriend.......
girlfriend......
wife...
husband.......
"someone" who is there for us,
someone we can rely on,
someone we can trust,
someone we enjoy to be with,
someone to talk to,
someone who is interesting,
someone who cares,
someone who loves us,
someone to love,
someone to hang out with,
someone to make love to,
someone to wake up with,
someone to fall asleep with,
someone to travel with,
someone to enjoy live with,
someone to take care of us when we are sick,
someone to give us a glass of water when we are dyeing.....lol.......
SOMEONE!!!!!
And we are looking for that special, unique, compatible SOMEONE.
We hope, we believe, we wait, we look, we dream......
And we create that special someone in our mind.
And that someone is so perfect and special that at some point it is hard to believe that this special someone actually exists.......
and we go through search, failures, selection, wrong choices, pain.....
and we do not give up...... we hope......
and one day that special someone finds us........
I am not imagining, I am not dreaming, it happened to one of my friends.
She found him. Or he found her. Or actually they found each other.
They are perfect in each others eyes.
He is her Mr. Right.
He is dreamy.
He is caring, loving, understanding, open, honest, easy, intellectual, interesting, no games, everything so real, so simple, so easy, so right.
It feels right, it feels perfect.
They are happy.
It is so perfect that it is hard to believe. All her friends are skeptical, like: yeah, how long they have been together, or do they live together, or do they even know each other,
or please, honey, be careful, it is so perfect that it is scary.
That's it.
We all want it, but we do not believe in it. We are skeptical. We are used to to be miserable.
Or we are just comfortable not been happy, because happiness is scary, it brings out our fears.
We are not used to good emotions, we are not used to feeling right.
We are used to drama, we are used to difficulties and games.
Perfectionism is scary.
Happiness is scary.
And we sabotage, we ruin, we kill it.
WE destroy it, and we start our search over.
Is it difficult to be happy?
Or it is difficult to make someone happy?
Or it is difficult to believe that someone loves us just the way we are?????
Is it hard stop playing games? or is it scary to commit and settle down?
Or .......what is it?!
DO NOT LIVE IN A PAST.......
What is past?! It is history. It is over. It is part of us, it is our teacher, it is our experience....
But it is done.
We passed it,
we had it,
we lived it,
but we choose to move on,
we closed (or we definitely should) this chapter.
Shut this door...door in your past.
Just learn on your mistakes.
Take your lessons to the present and/or future.
That's it.
But what do we do?! We live in a past. We use imagination, creativity, dreams, hopes and we make our past so appealing and dreamy adding what didn't exist. Why do we forget the worst parts and remember only happy moments that take us back again and again. We can not focus on a present, we go back and torture ourselves with "what if", "what have I done wrong", "may be", "why".
MY girlfriend recently mentioned that she is still into her "ex" (after 8 years of separation), and she can not find anybody relevantly even close to that person, and she never felt anything similar with anyone else..... Why do we do it to ourselves?!
"Ex" that she has in her mind, in her memories simply doesn't exist. He is not the same person what he was 8 years ago, plus all those 8 years she was creating him, she was fixing, coloring, building a perfect man in her mind. She met him after 8 years for dinner, he is bold now, fat and boring. Still not married, no kids, and lonely. She said she loves him, still. Nope, baby, you do not. You love the product of your imagination that you were creating all these years. Nothing left from that person that you were in love with 8 years ago, so move on. Stop comparing, stop looking back, stop feeding your imagination adding to his character qualities that he doesn't have and never did.
We will never love the same or experience the same or feel the same about different people and nothing is wrong with that.
We will love stronger, we will feel more passionate, and it will be different and that's ok.
Stop living in a past. Wake up, open your beautiful eyes, move on and enjoy your "today".
It is no "IFs", no "WHYs", it is because...... ask yourself just what I have learned, how I will use it in my present or future and live your live.
But it is done.
We passed it,
we had it,
we lived it,
but we choose to move on,
we closed (or we definitely should) this chapter.
Shut this door...door in your past.
Just learn on your mistakes.
Take your lessons to the present and/or future.
That's it.
But what do we do?! We live in a past. We use imagination, creativity, dreams, hopes and we make our past so appealing and dreamy adding what didn't exist. Why do we forget the worst parts and remember only happy moments that take us back again and again. We can not focus on a present, we go back and torture ourselves with "what if", "what have I done wrong", "may be", "why".
MY girlfriend recently mentioned that she is still into her "ex" (after 8 years of separation), and she can not find anybody relevantly even close to that person, and she never felt anything similar with anyone else..... Why do we do it to ourselves?!
"Ex" that she has in her mind, in her memories simply doesn't exist. He is not the same person what he was 8 years ago, plus all those 8 years she was creating him, she was fixing, coloring, building a perfect man in her mind. She met him after 8 years for dinner, he is bold now, fat and boring. Still not married, no kids, and lonely. She said she loves him, still. Nope, baby, you do not. You love the product of your imagination that you were creating all these years. Nothing left from that person that you were in love with 8 years ago, so move on. Stop comparing, stop looking back, stop feeding your imagination adding to his character qualities that he doesn't have and never did.
We will never love the same or experience the same or feel the same about different people and nothing is wrong with that.
We will love stronger, we will feel more passionate, and it will be different and that's ok.
Stop living in a past. Wake up, open your beautiful eyes, move on and enjoy your "today".
It is no "IFs", no "WHYs", it is because...... ask yourself just what I have learned, how I will use it in my present or future and live your live.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
YOU FIND IT WHEN YOU ARE NOT LOOKING......
Have you ever noticed that it is so easy to meet people when we are not waiting, hoping, looking....
We are on the plane looking tired, no make up, our hair is in a ponytail, we are focused doing some work on our laptop, and here he is.......
sitting next to us.......
almost a dream.
We are in the grocery store and our shopping cart filled with toilet paper, tampons, romantic movies, a bottle of wine and ice cream, and here he is.....
almost a dream in the line in front of us.
We are in a laundry room putting our panties in a dryer, in our sweatpants, sweatshirt and messy hair, and..........
here he is....
carrying a basket of his dirties......
almost a dream.....
Have you realized when we are with someone, when we are involved with someone, we meet people all the time, because we are not looking, because we are happy, because we have a different energy and people are attracted to us.
People are attracted to our energy and our happiness.
We look different when we are not looking.
Have you ever heard a comment that "you smell like sex",
yes,
we do smell like sex when we have someone, we smell like sex, because we have sex, because we are happy.
It is like a special spell on us when we are not looking that attracts men, special scent... And when we are looking it is like we have a huge sign on our forehead that pushes men away.
So what should we do?!
Stop looking when we are looking, and start looking when we are not looking?!
I think, we should just stop waiting for a miracle to happen,
it will happen,
it will come,
it will find us,
or we will accidentally find it.
We are on the plane looking tired, no make up, our hair is in a ponytail, we are focused doing some work on our laptop, and here he is.......
sitting next to us.......
almost a dream.
We are in the grocery store and our shopping cart filled with toilet paper, tampons, romantic movies, a bottle of wine and ice cream, and here he is.....
almost a dream in the line in front of us.
We are in a laundry room putting our panties in a dryer, in our sweatpants, sweatshirt and messy hair, and..........
here he is....
carrying a basket of his dirties......
almost a dream.....
Have you realized when we are with someone, when we are involved with someone, we meet people all the time, because we are not looking, because we are happy, because we have a different energy and people are attracted to us.
People are attracted to our energy and our happiness.
We look different when we are not looking.
Have you ever heard a comment that "you smell like sex",
yes,
we do smell like sex when we have someone, we smell like sex, because we have sex, because we are happy.
It is like a special spell on us when we are not looking that attracts men, special scent... And when we are looking it is like we have a huge sign on our forehead that pushes men away.
So what should we do?!
Stop looking when we are looking, and start looking when we are not looking?!
I think, we should just stop waiting for a miracle to happen,
it will happen,
it will come,
it will find us,
or we will accidentally find it.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
WHAT SHOULD MEN KNOW ABOUT WOMEN?!
I am going to share with you a couple experiences (mine or my friends' experiences, it doesn't really matter, it happened).
1. On a date a guy was talking about himself, talking about himself for hours. And yes, he was encouraged to talk about himself, he was asked questions, tons of questions, and he had a listener, a beautiful woman who sat there and listened, and asked all those questions about him: who he is, what he likes, what he dreams about. She really wanted to know about him as much as possible.
He asked a couple questions, not really listening to her answers.
He was checking her out, looking at her legs, boobs, lips, whatever, but he wasn't listening, because he was too busy talking about himself.
Yeah, talk to man about himself and he will be listening to you for hours, ha ha ha.
It's true.
I feel sometimes like men enjoy hearing themselves talking, may be they love the sound of their voices?!
SO IF YOU WANT TO GET A GUY: TALK TO HIM ABOUT HIMSELF AND HE WILL BE LISTENING TO YOU FOR HOURS,
AND HE WILL LIKE YOU,
HE WILL LIKE HIMSELF EVEN MORE SHARING WITH YOU HOW WONDERFUL HE IS.
AND IF YOU WANT TO GET A WOMAN, PLEASE, GUYS, ASK US, TALK TO US, WONDER ABOUT US, BE CURIOUS ABOUT WHO WE ARE, WHAT WE LIKE, WHAT MAKES US HAPPY IF YOU WANT TO SEE US AGAIN, IF YOU WANT SOMETHING MORE THAN ONE EVENING, IF YOU WANT A RELATIONSHIP.
Please, correct me if I am wrong. I want to hear your opinion, your thoughts, your ideas, your point of view.
Share it!!!!!
1. On a date a guy was talking about himself, talking about himself for hours. And yes, he was encouraged to talk about himself, he was asked questions, tons of questions, and he had a listener, a beautiful woman who sat there and listened, and asked all those questions about him: who he is, what he likes, what he dreams about. She really wanted to know about him as much as possible.
He asked a couple questions, not really listening to her answers.
He was checking her out, looking at her legs, boobs, lips, whatever, but he wasn't listening, because he was too busy talking about himself.
Yeah, talk to man about himself and he will be listening to you for hours, ha ha ha.
It's true.
I feel sometimes like men enjoy hearing themselves talking, may be they love the sound of their voices?!
SO IF YOU WANT TO GET A GUY: TALK TO HIM ABOUT HIMSELF AND HE WILL BE LISTENING TO YOU FOR HOURS,
AND HE WILL LIKE YOU,
HE WILL LIKE HIMSELF EVEN MORE SHARING WITH YOU HOW WONDERFUL HE IS.
AND IF YOU WANT TO GET A WOMAN, PLEASE, GUYS, ASK US, TALK TO US, WONDER ABOUT US, BE CURIOUS ABOUT WHO WE ARE, WHAT WE LIKE, WHAT MAKES US HAPPY IF YOU WANT TO SEE US AGAIN, IF YOU WANT SOMETHING MORE THAN ONE EVENING, IF YOU WANT A RELATIONSHIP.
Please, correct me if I am wrong. I want to hear your opinion, your thoughts, your ideas, your point of view.
Share it!!!!!
ARE MEN CHANGEABLE?
I always thought that women are able to change men. Because we are so powerful and so smart. We are strong! We can manipulate, we know how to get what we want. We can be so creative in getting desired. We can save the world, so we can change the world. So we can change men. Ha! Time goes by and it strikes us: men are not changeable, people are not changeable. May be we can accept, adjust, but not to change.
DO NOT STOP BELIEVING...................
We should believe. We must believe.
Otherwise,
what is the point?!
We should not settle for less, because if it happens we will always wonder "what if.....".
And I did meet those "perfect guys",
guys, who do not play games,
who actually cares,
who wants to know who you are and what makes you happy,
who will do anything for you,
who can love,
who understands,
who adores you,
who makes you smile,
who makes you happy.
There were not my "perfect guys", but it's not the point.
They do exist.
DO not give up on yourself,
do not give up on relationship,
and please do not give up on happiness,
because you deserve it.
Otherwise,
what is the point?!
We should not settle for less, because if it happens we will always wonder "what if.....".
And I did meet those "perfect guys",
guys, who do not play games,
who actually cares,
who wants to know who you are and what makes you happy,
who will do anything for you,
who can love,
who understands,
who adores you,
who makes you smile,
who makes you happy.
There were not my "perfect guys", but it's not the point.
They do exist.
DO not give up on yourself,
do not give up on relationship,
and please do not give up on happiness,
because you deserve it.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
GAMES WE PLAY.....
We all play games...... men do it, women do it.
Why?
To be interesting?
To play "hard to get"?
To make it more exciting at least in the beginning?!
Because everyone plays?!
But, women, imagine relationship with no games: he calls right away when he gets your number, he asks you out the same day, and he wants to see you again and again, and again, flowers, you are not doubting if he likes you, you know he is crazy about you, weekends together, he sleeps over, you are getting the keys from his house, it is moving, it is going, it is flying, no fights, no arguments, nothing to tell your girlfriends, no crazy stories, no tears, sex is amazing, he is perfect, he is happy with your postcards, loves your cooking, adores you, spoils you....
what happens next?!
ha ha - we wake up,
lol,
welcome to the REAL WORLD,
it is doesn't exist.
It's our fantasies,
our dreams,
our sick imagination.
And IF even something similar does exist, we will find 1000 reasons to make ourselves miserable, or worried, or not satisfied, so wake up and live your life!!!!!!!
Why?
To be interesting?
To play "hard to get"?
To make it more exciting at least in the beginning?!
Because everyone plays?!
But, women, imagine relationship with no games: he calls right away when he gets your number, he asks you out the same day, and he wants to see you again and again, and again, flowers, you are not doubting if he likes you, you know he is crazy about you, weekends together, he sleeps over, you are getting the keys from his house, it is moving, it is going, it is flying, no fights, no arguments, nothing to tell your girlfriends, no crazy stories, no tears, sex is amazing, he is perfect, he is happy with your postcards, loves your cooking, adores you, spoils you....
what happens next?!
ha ha - we wake up,
lol,
welcome to the REAL WORLD,
it is doesn't exist.
It's our fantasies,
our dreams,
our sick imagination.
And IF even something similar does exist, we will find 1000 reasons to make ourselves miserable, or worried, or not satisfied, so wake up and live your life!!!!!!!
A KNIGHT ON A WHITE HORSE IS NOT COMING!
Sorry to break it to you, but the fairy tales do not come true!
So, stop expecting a handsome, strong, sexy knight who suppose to knock on your door and save you!
He is not coming!
Not on a black horse, not on a white horse.
You know why?!
BECAUSE SIMPLY HE DOESN'T EXIST.
We should stop waiting and live our live.
We were raised listening to the magic fairy tales with happy ending, with princes, and kings, and where dreams come true.
Growing older we watched movies with intelligent, smart, interesting, strong men who fall in love, who can care, love and make women happy.
We were and we are listening to the love songs hoping, dreaming, imagining.......
believing in love,
in magical relationship.
Does anyone actually have anything like this?
something at least similar?!
So, stop expecting a handsome, strong, sexy knight who suppose to knock on your door and save you!
He is not coming!
Not on a black horse, not on a white horse.
You know why?!
BECAUSE SIMPLY HE DOESN'T EXIST.
We should stop waiting and live our live.
We were raised listening to the magic fairy tales with happy ending, with princes, and kings, and where dreams come true.
Growing older we watched movies with intelligent, smart, interesting, strong men who fall in love, who can care, love and make women happy.
We were and we are listening to the love songs hoping, dreaming, imagining.......
believing in love,
in magical relationship.
Does anyone actually have anything like this?
something at least similar?!
Friday, July 30, 2010
INTERESTING PEOPLE!?
Have you noticed that it is hard to find a nice relaxing interesting entertaining conversationalist?! Is it even a word "conversationalist"?! Someone said: big minds talk about ideas and small minds talk about other people..... or something like that. Why? Why are we getting trapped in depressing, casual, judgmental conversations?! Lets talk about the world, about our dreams, hopes, ideas, future, bright, promising future. Lets save the World! Lets save ourselves from been trapped, caged, possessed by negativeness of the life! LIFE IS TOO SHORT! SEIZE THE DAY!!!!
IF HE DOESN'T CALL.......
I was raised with the following philosophy: "If man wants you he will find you, not knowing your name or phone number or your address, he will find you. So never chase a man, never call first, never start a conversation first, if he needs you, if he wants you, he will find the way..........."
Remember the movie "He is not that into you"......... so I guess if he doesn't call - he is not that into you.........
It is hard to live with this theory in America where dating full of games and rules.
You can not be honest, you can not be straight forward, you can not be open, you should not speak up your mind.............
Aren't you tired of games?!?!?!
SO if he does not call - just move on.
Why should we waste our time!?
It will be a man who follows through, who keeps his word, who needs you, who appreciates you.
Do not let anyone to love you less than you love yourself.
Do not let anyone to treat you the way you do not deserve.
NO NEGATIVE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!
NO FLAKY PEOPLE!
RESPECT YOURSELF!
DO NOT SELL YOURSELF SHORT!
YOU DESERVE THE BEST!
DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME ON JERKS!
GOOD LUCK!
Remember the movie "He is not that into you"......... so I guess if he doesn't call - he is not that into you.........
It is hard to live with this theory in America where dating full of games and rules.
You can not be honest, you can not be straight forward, you can not be open, you should not speak up your mind.............
Aren't you tired of games?!?!?!
SO if he does not call - just move on.
Why should we waste our time!?
It will be a man who follows through, who keeps his word, who needs you, who appreciates you.
Do not let anyone to love you less than you love yourself.
Do not let anyone to treat you the way you do not deserve.
NO NEGATIVE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!
NO FLAKY PEOPLE!
RESPECT YOURSELF!
DO NOT SELL YOURSELF SHORT!
YOU DESERVE THE BEST!
DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME ON JERKS!
GOOD LUCK!
Friday, July 30th 2010.
Let be honest and sincere, let be open, truthful even if it hurts sometimes. It hurts for a minute but helps us in a longer run, right?!
I want to share this blog with all my girlfriends and friends, and just people I do and i do not know, because I believe it might help. I believe we can help each other.
Sometimes we just want to be heard, sometimes we just need an objective opinion, or brutal, ugly truth.
I am a brutally honest person (not always a plus), but what is the point of lying, right?!
So we will have a topic to discuss every week or every day.
Feel free to ask questions, share your experiences, give an advice.
Lets help each other to be happy.
I want to share this blog with all my girlfriends and friends, and just people I do and i do not know, because I believe it might help. I believe we can help each other.
Sometimes we just want to be heard, sometimes we just need an objective opinion, or brutal, ugly truth.
I am a brutally honest person (not always a plus), but what is the point of lying, right?!
So we will have a topic to discuss every week or every day.
Feel free to ask questions, share your experiences, give an advice.
Lets help each other to be happy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)